#MyTwoCents Series #15. Three cheers to the MEN, You LOVE !!!

While you & yours, me & mine,we all have our moments of dominating each other from time to time. This International Men’s Day, I thought of giving a tribute to all the men in my life – my dad, my brother, all guy friends (not every boy who is a friend is a boyfriend, yeah?), well also to my boy friends 🙂 by trying to get into their shoes and see the world with their pair of eyes.

Factoid : Well, I HAD to !! Rather, I was challenged to look at the world from a different perspective, when one of my readers observed how most of my stories & write-ups are either about Motherhood or about kids. Why there is no reference to WHAT GUYS THINK ABOUT PARENTING, LIFE, SPOUSE, CAREER, so on & so forth…….phew !!!! He did give me a long list. He had a point !! And I decided to change HATS !! Past few weeks, I have spent some time thinking and behaving like how my partner does, interacted with my close guy friends, took their viewpoint, kind of drilled them.

I confess, the transition of looking at the world through a guy’s eyes wasn’t an easy one. Every time, the feminist in me would come up with so many counter questions that instead of developing an insight it would give me a migraine.

It was important to understand LIFE as they see it !!! This should be called- Evolution of Thoughts or Perspective !!

So, to channelize my thoughts, I decided to play Mythbuster and took the top 5 myths that exist around guys!!

Myth – (short form of MyThoughts) v/s Reality (from the horse’s mouth🙂)

Myth #1. Guys are TOUGH !! And so DESERVE NO MERCY !!

Reality – We are made different, BOTH anatomically and physiologically. As a result, there are psychological differences too. Naturally, each one of us has different priorities, we aim for different things in life but the ultimate objective is to seek for happiness, obviously thru different means and hence, the CONFLICT.

Morale of the story- Respect Individual Differences 😊😊 !!

Myth #2. He has more windows, opportunities to rant/ vent and friends too. Obviously, he is less stressed out. And so DESERVES NO MERCY !!

Reality – While catching up over a fag, drinks or a game of pool or golf is much preferred over a day spent in shopping. Ease of expressions doesn’t come very handy here. Soda bubbles are required for those bottled up emotions. To confine, sharing your mind space is a must.

Morale of the story- MeTime is essential for all😎😎!!

Myth #3. Won’t understand my child as I do, after all, I was the one who carried my baby for 9 months, not him!!! And so when he makes a mistake while handling the baby, he DESERVES NO MERCY !!

Reality – There is always a first time, one needs to get involved to be able to take responsibilities. A lot depends on the parenting role models and our value systems that we have been given during the early years of life.

Morale of the story – Don’t be a control freak, learn to relax 🤗🤗!!

Myth #4. Sex/ physical intimacy/ experience is all that matters to him, he is ZERO at emotions. And so DESERVES NO MERCY !!

Reality- Well -well !!! Isn’t that one of the prime reason after LOVE, why we get into a relationship called- MARRIAGE? It can’t be put on a back seat. While it starts with physical attraction for both, over a period of time our priorities may change. Also, taking each other for granted is a commonly made DEADLY mistake.

Morale of the story – Keep the flame burning 😉😉 !!

Myth #5. His only responsibility is to bring money home, and if he fails in doing so DESERVES NO MERCY !!

Reality – Even if the decision is mutual that you run the house and he manages finance, not every day is the same. Failures, disasters happen even outside kitchen😊. Remember, its okay to make mistakes.

Morale of the story – Forgive & Forget🙂🙂 !!

As a matter of fact, how our guys behave depends on how we as a society have conditioned them, their behaviour patterns. So if we want to see the change, in the way our men treat us, we all will have to make an effort, parents, families, schools, offices and the community collectively.

Of late, the talks have begun on how to raise boys so that they are able to cope up with much more liberated, independent and empowered women ever, in the times to come. It’s a tough task !!

While we got busy with “बेटी बचाओ, बेटी पढ़ाओ ” ( save the girl child!!) unintentionally we have ignored our boys. They have been growing in the wild as a wild berries/ flowers/ weeds subject to the amount of care they got from their significant others. The increase in crime rates are a clear reflection that our guys need special attention & care.

Moving forward the approach, I suggest both corrective and preventive measures. But most importantly we need to instill the concept of Self-Care amongst our men.

While each one of us, irrespective of what gender, experience emotional turmoils at every phase in our lives, all of us need that emotional support from our significant others. The substance abuse be it alcohol or drugs, physical abuse such as molestation, domestic violence & rape and even suicides are results of these suppressed emotions.

Today, make an effort to reach out to him. A friend, a son, a brother, father or a lover, let’s take time to tell them that they matter to us, their opinion & voice matter to us, we value every sacrifice that they make for us.

Three cheers to the men, we love !!!

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#stereotypes, #toxicmindsets, #selfcare

https://www.desimartini.com/news/htcity/entertainment/marjaavaan-sound-technician-nimish-pilankar-dies-at-29-colleagues-discuss-how-techs-work-overtime-rarely-get-paid-article126230.htm

Food- My Religion !! It’s my connection with My Soul !!#AvocadoSmoothie 🥑

Today, when the Veggies & Fruits are infused & loaded with pesticides, anything that’s labeled as Organic sells like a “hot cake”  and becomes a “must buy” for a vegan & a food freak like myself.

So last Sunday I hit a jackpot, when a friend offered a dozen of Lush Green Organic Avocados straight from Tanav & Tara’s planation!!!  A couple of years back if you had asked me about Avocados I probably would have made a face  . But these days, I can drool over it like a Labrador Puppy.

While Avocados’ probable origin is from South Central of Mexico, today its the most sought after fruit for all the health & diet conscious people globally. Primarily because it’s loaded with heart-healthy monosaturated fatty acids, minerals,  Vitamins & fibers. It’s got a wide spectrum of benefits ranging from weight loss to prevention of cancer. The biggest challenge before a foodie is to optimally utilize all my creativity to make most out of it and so I went from one search engine to another. Googled, Youtubed even explored cooking groups on WhatsApp& FB!!! And then I patiently waited for them to ripe like a kid checking almost every hour, every day till they finally riped.

So I gave my creative self a free hand to explore all possible combination and permutation with the fruit. From vegetable salad to fruit salad, with sprouts & in pasta, with Guacamole & broccoli. But my favorite is the avocado coconut milk smoothie!!

If I were born in Egypt during the times when they still followed the tradition of burying mummies, mine would have tons of Avocados, loads of cuisine, avocado fruit salads, creamy pasta, yummy smoothies, lip-smacking dips & much more… And I would be thrilled if all the were especially from Tanav & Tara’s plantations!!

#avocado, #coconut, #coconutmilk, #mexico, #organic, #veggies, #fruits, #guacamole, #broccoli, #pesticides, #mexico, #egypt

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Birthdays are Special, especially if it’s your MIL’s 😇

So, it was around that time of the year, when we celebrate my #Mum-In-Law’s birthday 🎉. Coincidentally this year, we were celebrating it together. Like any other #type2diabetic patients, she is not allowed to consume sugar, which means no birthday cake 🎂. Most of you would agree, that after a certain age, parents also need to be pampered like kids😃. What birthday celebration without a birthday cake!!”, she said. And I agreed, she had a point!!

I am a firm believer that #Birthdays are special events, and they must be celebrated likewise, Period.

So, had to come up with something brilliant. Instantly came up with an idea, and like any “tech-age, non-cooking food lover” I took refuge in #youtube. It’s one if those times when you thank #martincooper and #robertekahn & #vintcerf’s of the world, to invent mobile phones & Internet. I knew who to follow; when it comes to Gujarat’s favourite Cuisine #khamandhokala, it has to be #tarladalal

Now, this may not be the first of its kind birthday cake but it did what a cake is supposed to do. It made her happy like a kid!! Her face lit up, her smile widened and touched her eyes, it was “THE” moment in which I was sure, I could make her day special. She hugged me like an elated, excited kid and told me that she is proud to have me as her family!! That made it special for me too!!

#Birthdays are special, more so if it’your Mum-in-Law’s !!
#gujarati #cuisine #dhokala

A dhokla can win & melt hearts like no one does!!

#birthday, #cake, #dhokla, #diabeties, #youtube, #internet, #tarladalal, #foodrecepie, #family, #loveforfood,#motherinlaws


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Food- My Religion !! It’s my connection with My Soul !!#Poha

PMS or no PMS, I have always believed that good food has a magical, calming and soothing effect on me & my moods. And I am spellbound. For me, Food is my absolute religion and so I have many Gods, many many favorites…one of it that comes very handy in all hours of a day, which somehow has managed to sneak in my diet chart quietly is this amazing favourites, mouth watering, tantalizing Indian savories#indoripoha (rice flakes)!!

When you dig deeper in the history (basically Wikipedia 🙃 for our generation), you will find how post-independence somewhere in the central part of the Indian subcontinent, in the city of Indore these flakes of flattened rice found its way to glory. For a country which lives mostly on two grains wheat & rice, some creative food artisans would have explored options to make food more delectable to the palate.

Poha does full justice to most of your sensory organs. Like as they say, you first eat food using your eyes, then through your nose and finally, the mouth enjoys it. The colour contrasts of pink onion, white potatoes, red tomatoes, green peas, curry leaves & coriander, with tiny black mustard seeds sprinkled all along the turmeric soaked flattened rice flakes…And if this wasn’t enough to tantalise your taste buds, garnish it with tangy lemon juice drops & crispy green chillies. It’s like a poetry, written with love ❤️, it’s like a colourful painting where all the careful details make it a picture perfect!!

The greatness of this cuisine lies in the fact that it can be customised as per the regional or personal preference for taste. You can add fennel seeds & sugar if you like it a bit sweet. If you want to give your taste buds a spice kick, just add lahsun sev or indori namkeen to garnish. It’s such a typical representation of us Indians that while keeping its identity intact, it warmly adopts everything that adds & increases it’s flavour and makes the look & taste more richer.

So next time you travel to the Central India, make sure that “IndoriPoha with masala chai” is in your list of Must-Try!!

#coldpressed-groundnut-oil, #flattened-rice, #Potatoes, #tomatoes, #peas, #greenchillies, #coriander, #musturdseeds, #turmeric, #India, #indiansavoury, #snack, #namkeen, #vegan, #dietryfiber, #food, #loveforgoodfood, #pms, #poha,

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SnipSnapChat#6. I need Space !!

Sibling- LoveHate Relationship Goals!!

My, soon-to-be 10YO has been asking for her own “SPACE” lately, which is a LEGIT for her and ABSOLUTE BIZZARE for my 6YO.

While coming back from watching MISSION MANGAL, they both fell into another fresh bout of argument, about not having enough space at the back seat of the car.

“How much more SPACE, you need? If you want more, we will launch you in the SPACE, along with Chandrayaan and than you can have the entire SPACE to yourself!!!”, my younger one suggested.

#missionmangal, #chandrayaan, #space, #momoftwo, #sisterlove, #siblingrivalery, #personalspace

Poem 5. A note of Apology, for Delhi…

Sorry, we left you in ICU…

Dear Delhi,

You have been molested
And I am a culprit too..
I wished there was something
I could actually do..

A place of historical, heritage value,
We have treated you like we treat our women, Yes we did!!
We raped, exploited & abused you!!
And than to wash away our guilt,
We would light a candle on India Gate, too!!
But sorry, we can’t light a candle for you
As it may cause global warming,
I thought, you knew…

At the moment, the only thing I could do is
Wish you a speedy recovery and
Sorry, we left you in ICU !!

#pollution, #globalwarming, #abusingnature, #cosmopolitan, #indiagate, #delhi

Life in IT #3 A Winning Mindset !!

He was one of the Ace Performers in his team, “Boss’s favourite” a computer science graduate from one of the reputed Engineering Colleges. So when he decided to quit the job, it had to be the talk of the town, buzz of the hour, a breaking news!!!

He always had this spark, this zeal to pick up challenges. His friends loved him for his great sense of humor. If there was any blue ocean strategy project coming, everyone would know whose name will be on the top of the list. Interestingly, he knew exactly why all his managers wanted him to be on the most critical & high pressure projects.

It was not just because of his tech-know-how or THE “Zero Defect” every single time his code went the code review. It was also because he was a bachelor, who lived thousands of kilometers away his family, in a paying-guest accommodation. So, there were no commitments at personal front, he could be made to stretch for any long hours, the onsite visits, for him would extend from weeks to months, no distractions !!

So what would have triggered this decision?

Thank you Ganesh for playing along…It’s so true that an individual’s mindset doesn’t change, with time his/her priorities may change.

PS: Would truly appreciate if you leave us a response on catchgeekay@gmail.com (Ganesh) or to shivali.nishant@gmail.com